So lately I have been taking Abby with me when I run errands. And a lot of time I have to run to the bank or banks. Now, I personally bank with Wachovia, but I have a corporate account with RBC, and Derrick banks at BB&T. So, she has been to all 3. Well, typically when I go to Wachovia, the teller sends Abby a bone in the tube, just like they send kids lollipops. And that usually causes her to go crazy (Abby loves free stuff).
Well, on my most recent errand run Abby accompanied me to all 3 banks. First I went to the ATM at RBC, and I could tell that Abby knew we were at a bank because she started getting excited. Then I went to BB&T where Abby was obviously annoyed that the teller did not comment on how cute she was or send her a bone. So, by the time that we went to Wachovia Abby had perched herself on my lap and anxiously watched as my deposit went up the tube only to come back with a small slip of paper. She gave me those sad puppy eyes and I couldn't help but feel bad for her.
The bottom line is that Abby values free bones more than free checking!
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Convention Etiquette
I am outraged because I recently attended a 3-day convention and was appalled by the behavior that I was witness to.
So, I have taken the liberty of outlining 5 rules of etiquette that should be followed at conventions, concerts, sporting events, and any other large public outing.
1. Stand in line and no pushing! Seriously, didn't you go to kindergarten?
2. And speaking of lines, if you see that the right line is for turning and you need to turn right, get in the right line, don't do the un-Christian thing and fly up the left turn line and expect me to do the Christian thing and let you in.
3. If you are going to have to use the bathroom more than 5 times, perhaps you should wear a Depends or better yet get yourself checked out. Because sitting in that second seat from the end seriously sucked for me. I felt like I did like 20 squats per day, getting up and sitting down every other minute. Exhausting!
4. A picnic cooler is one that will not fit under your seat. If it requires its own seat it is too big. If your cooler is so big that it has wheels and a handle to pull it ... need I say more?
5. Seats should be shared and not saved. If they don't live with you and they didn't ride with you, don't save them a seat. Because the only thing that is bound to happen is that you will save them seats and they will walk right in and find their own seats. And in essence, you have stolen seats from some "needy seat person."
The bottom line is follow the Golden Rule.
So, I have taken the liberty of outlining 5 rules of etiquette that should be followed at conventions, concerts, sporting events, and any other large public outing.
1. Stand in line and no pushing! Seriously, didn't you go to kindergarten?
2. And speaking of lines, if you see that the right line is for turning and you need to turn right, get in the right line, don't do the un-Christian thing and fly up the left turn line and expect me to do the Christian thing and let you in.
3. If you are going to have to use the bathroom more than 5 times, perhaps you should wear a Depends or better yet get yourself checked out. Because sitting in that second seat from the end seriously sucked for me. I felt like I did like 20 squats per day, getting up and sitting down every other minute. Exhausting!
4. A picnic cooler is one that will not fit under your seat. If it requires its own seat it is too big. If your cooler is so big that it has wheels and a handle to pull it ... need I say more?
5. Seats should be shared and not saved. If they don't live with you and they didn't ride with you, don't save them a seat. Because the only thing that is bound to happen is that you will save them seats and they will walk right in and find their own seats. And in essence, you have stolen seats from some "needy seat person."
The bottom line is follow the Golden Rule.
Friday, May 29, 2009
10 Things No One Tells You About Marriage!
Okay, so I have been married 3 months and 8 days ... and I have come too realize that there are a few things that no one told me about marriage. So for those of you that haven't made the leap, I hope this helps you. And for those of you that are married, I'm sure that you will feel me!
So here it goes ...
1. It is physically impossible for a man and woman to share a bathroom unless that bathroom has two sinks, two toliets, two showers, two bathtubs, two floors and two different air supplies. Need I say more?
2. When spending discretionary income, estimates of the amount spent are always best. And when all else fails, say that you spent it on gas. (Who keeps those little gas receipts anyway?)
3. Husband, wife, and in-laws do not an instant family make. His is his and hers is hers. And it will always be that way, no matter how well everyone gets along.
4. It doesn't matter if you have a combined income of $50,000 or $150,000, if you married a spender, they are still gonna be spender, and if you married a saver, they are still gonna be a saver.
5. Start from scratch! Do not move into the home or apartment previously occupied by one of you. Otherwise, you will have one spouse displaying "only child syndrome" over everything from closet space to the bathroom while the other spouse is left feeling that they are nothing more than a visitor.
6. Your spouse cannot possibly fulfill every need you have. You will have to have people outside of your relationship that are crucial for your success. For instance, a husband cannot reasonably expect his wife to take 5 hours out of her Saturday to watch the NFL draft. This is what his "boys" are for. And this brings me to my next point ...
7. Watching every single football, basketball, golf, and baseball game is not a requirement to live. Therefore, the wife is under no obligation to watch any of these. However, I do believe that it is healthy to show interest in at least some of the things that interest your spouse. And on the flip side, the husband should show some kind of balance.
8. I have heard about the "freshman 20," but seriously how come no one told me about the "newlywed 20?"
9. A single woman is never happy to have her "friend." A married woman prays for her "friend."
10. Men have selective hearing that allows them to hear only three things 1) sports games, 2) the microwave beep and 3) the phone call of his mother.
So here it goes ...
1. It is physically impossible for a man and woman to share a bathroom unless that bathroom has two sinks, two toliets, two showers, two bathtubs, two floors and two different air supplies. Need I say more?
2. When spending discretionary income, estimates of the amount spent are always best. And when all else fails, say that you spent it on gas. (Who keeps those little gas receipts anyway?)
3. Husband, wife, and in-laws do not an instant family make. His is his and hers is hers. And it will always be that way, no matter how well everyone gets along.
4. It doesn't matter if you have a combined income of $50,000 or $150,000, if you married a spender, they are still gonna be spender, and if you married a saver, they are still gonna be a saver.
5. Start from scratch! Do not move into the home or apartment previously occupied by one of you. Otherwise, you will have one spouse displaying "only child syndrome" over everything from closet space to the bathroom while the other spouse is left feeling that they are nothing more than a visitor.
6. Your spouse cannot possibly fulfill every need you have. You will have to have people outside of your relationship that are crucial for your success. For instance, a husband cannot reasonably expect his wife to take 5 hours out of her Saturday to watch the NFL draft. This is what his "boys" are for. And this brings me to my next point ...
7. Watching every single football, basketball, golf, and baseball game is not a requirement to live. Therefore, the wife is under no obligation to watch any of these. However, I do believe that it is healthy to show interest in at least some of the things that interest your spouse. And on the flip side, the husband should show some kind of balance.
8. I have heard about the "freshman 20," but seriously how come no one told me about the "newlywed 20?"
9. A single woman is never happy to have her "friend." A married woman prays for her "friend."
10. Men have selective hearing that allows them to hear only three things 1) sports games, 2) the microwave beep and 3) the phone call of his mother.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
If you are over the age of 35 please read!!!
If you are over the age of 35 you should own a home by this time in your life. What is wrong with you that you still must rent? What have you been doing for the last 17 years? Seriously, unless you just got of prison or just got divorced, what is your excuse?
Okay, so you jacked up your credit in college, but you still haven't mastered the idea of what credit is, how to use it, and not living above your means .... in the 13 years since then?
Okay, so maybe you didn't go to college (I will save that one for another day), but you have managed to waste all of your money on luxury cars, expensive clothes, and lavish vacations ... with the help of your credit cards of course.
So stop. Just stop! Stop buying stuff you can't afford, stop using credit. And lastly, look up the word "save" in the dictionary.
Call me stuck up if you want to, but I seriously think that by age 35 you should have it together.
Okay, so you jacked up your credit in college, but you still haven't mastered the idea of what credit is, how to use it, and not living above your means .... in the 13 years since then?
Okay, so maybe you didn't go to college (I will save that one for another day), but you have managed to waste all of your money on luxury cars, expensive clothes, and lavish vacations ... with the help of your credit cards of course.
So stop. Just stop! Stop buying stuff you can't afford, stop using credit. And lastly, look up the word "save" in the dictionary.
Call me stuck up if you want to, but I seriously think that by age 35 you should have it together.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Just wear your wedding band!
So, my husband has this thing where he has to take his ring off immediately when he comes home. And he absolutely refuses to sleep in it. I think that this is ridiculous. What, do you want to dream about not being married? What is the deal?
I kept telling him that he was going to forget to put it on before leaving for work one day. And sure enough one day I went into the bedroom and what do I see on the floor of all places ... his wedding band! And he came home from work that day and I didn't say a word. He thought he had gotten away with it until I confronted him about it the next day. Then it was punishment time ... two options: either sleep on the couch for a night or a third body in the bed. Yep, you guessed it ... Abby! To my surprise he actually chose to let Abby sleep in the bed with us. And of course Abby crawled right in the middle of us.
But, all of this could have been avoided if he just wore his wedding band! My guess is that he is going to have a lot more opportunities to get closer to Abby in the future ;-)
I kept telling him that he was going to forget to put it on before leaving for work one day. And sure enough one day I went into the bedroom and what do I see on the floor of all places ... his wedding band! And he came home from work that day and I didn't say a word. He thought he had gotten away with it until I confronted him about it the next day. Then it was punishment time ... two options: either sleep on the couch for a night or a third body in the bed. Yep, you guessed it ... Abby! To my surprise he actually chose to let Abby sleep in the bed with us. And of course Abby crawled right in the middle of us.
But, all of this could have been avoided if he just wore his wedding band! My guess is that he is going to have a lot more opportunities to get closer to Abby in the future ;-)
Monday, April 6, 2009
Marriage does not equal kids!
Look, just because I am married does not mean that I am interested in a visit to the maternity ward. One does not automatically equate to the other. I actually like my life, without the thrill of dirty diapers and crying babies.
And stop telling me that I'm gonna change my mind about wanting to have a baby, because I'm not!
Look, I know that misery loves company, but stop wishing such evils on me. Don't get me wrong, I think that children are a blessing from God, but an even better blessing is giving them back to their parents at the end of the day ;-)
Seriously though, if we do decide to have children, I'm gonna skip past the dirty diapers and sleepless nights, and adopt a potty-trained preschooler.
And stop telling me that I'm gonna change my mind about wanting to have a baby, because I'm not!
Look, I know that misery loves company, but stop wishing such evils on me. Don't get me wrong, I think that children are a blessing from God, but an even better blessing is giving them back to their parents at the end of the day ;-)
Seriously though, if we do decide to have children, I'm gonna skip past the dirty diapers and sleepless nights, and adopt a potty-trained preschooler.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Thanks, but no thanks!
Have you ever been given a gift and absolutely hated it? I'm not talking about the hand knitted scarf that your grandmother gave you, I'm talking about the pink sweater your best friend gave you that knows you absolutely loathe pink. Is it ever okay to say "thanks, but no thanks" when someone buys you something that they should have already known you won't like? Do you always have to say "thank you?"
See, my thoughts are that if your friend is really a friend and wants to know if you like it, you should be able to be honest and say "no." The whole idea of a gift is the thought, right? But, where is the thought if you buy me something that you already know I dislike. The insensitivity is on the part of the giver, not the receiver.
I really need to know if I am wrong about this, so please weigh in on this one. I have made it so that everyone has the ability to comment now.
See, my thoughts are that if your friend is really a friend and wants to know if you like it, you should be able to be honest and say "no." The whole idea of a gift is the thought, right? But, where is the thought if you buy me something that you already know I dislike. The insensitivity is on the part of the giver, not the receiver.
I really need to know if I am wrong about this, so please weigh in on this one. I have made it so that everyone has the ability to comment now.
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